Proud Fan of the Most Hated Team in the Majors!

The Wall-Street Journal has declared the Cleveland Indians the MLB’s most hated team. Using an Internet algorithm built by the Nielsen Company that analyzes how people feel about certain things, the Indians… not the Yankees… not the Red Sox… the Indians… were determined to be the most hated team.

Thanks to the Nielsen Co. we’ve finally won something. This study was done on the internet, and posted on the internet, it must be true. When has Nielsen ever got something wrong? We are talking about the same company that got Sports Night and Arrested Development cancelled. The same company that gave us a few more seasons worth of well-developed ancillary characters that were vital to the Heroes storyline.

“The algorithm worked by scouring the web for mentions of any baseball team, and then looked for words that revealed emotion or opinion, such as “hate”, “love”, “sucks”, and so forth.” I apologize, I’m part at fault for this ranking because I’m always Google Searching things like “Famous Indian People + Gandhi Sucks” and “Indian Casinos are poopy.” I’m not sure if Facebook fan pages count because I just joined “When the Yankees beat the British in the Revolutionary War, I was soooo happy,” and “I <3 Clean White Socks"

This algorithm has FAIL written all over, so here are the Top 10 Things I Think About This Study.
1. Also said NBA’s most hated team – Celtics, NFL’s most hated team –Vikings, NHL’s most hated team – Canadiens … +1 point for Racism on the internet!
2. It’s easy to hate the Indians, every time your team plays them you have a chance to win and winning isn’t everything you know.
3. If it weren’t for Johnny Depp and Disney, the Pirates probably would have past us. Arrr, I hate pirates.
4. Did Joakim Noah get to vote twice?
5. We scored a .9, they must have been taking into account runs per game.
6. Is Eric Wedge really that bitter?
7. John Rocker was only here for a year, so all you queers with AIDS and kids with purple hair on the Subway need to chillax.
8. DOES ALL CAPS COUNT DOUBLE??? WHAT ABOUT NUMEROUS EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!
9. What? Dorn bought the team and brought in Jack Parkman?
10. Imagine the screams of the Yankees fans.. “Nobody hates the Indians. PEOPLE HATE US WAY MORE!!”

Believe the Hype or is it Too Untrue?

In Judaism the Talmud teaches of the Tzadikim Nistarim or the Lamed Vav Tzadikim. It is said that at all times there are 36 special people in the world, and that were it not for them, all of them, if even one of them was missing, the world would come to an end. (A quick lesson in Gematria; Lamed-Vav. Lamed = 30 and Vav = 6, hence Lamed Vav Tzadikim). It is said that these 36 people's role in life is to justify the purpose of mankind in the eyes of G-d. Tradition states that their identities may not be known to themselves or to others, and that if one of them were to realize this role, they would die and be replaced by another.

It's an extremely interesting concept, whether you are the religious type or not. But when I was re-visiting a sermon our Rabbi gave a few Yom Kippur or ago, it got me thinking. The idea of the Lamed Vavniks, as they are called in Yiddush, is a lesson that can be taught through sports as well.

I believe that at any given time there are 36 Superstars in ALL OF SPORTS. Not just in the US but worldwide. This group of 36 athletes are on earth to justify the purpose of sports in the eyes of the public. If one of them were to realize this role, they would die and be replaced by another... Vince Carter or Allen Iverson anyone?

They return to their anonymity as soon as their task is accomplished, 'concealing' themselves once again in a community wherein they are relatively unknown... pretty much any Olympian?

The lamed-vavniks do not themselves know that they are ones of the 36. In fact, tradition has it that should a person claim to be one of the 36, that is proof positive that he is certainly not one... Jose Mourinho!

These 36 have such "avanah" (humility) that it precludes against their self-proclamations of being among the special.They are all to humble to belive they are one of the 36... Phil Mickelson?

Very few Superstars are truly humble. However, in sports an athlete who day in and day out shows us that they are a superstar rather than saying it, THAT in itself is humbling. The mysticism of the Lamed Vavniks disappears if people know who they are, however there is nothing against conjecture. When Roger Federer makes a shot and you just stop and wonder how on earth it was possible. You can believe he is one of the 36.

As I debated who are the 36, fifteen were obvious. These players sell tickets and put people in the seats, when they are coming to your city it becomes an event you must see. These 14 make us wonder if what we just saw really happened.

1. LeBron James

2. Kobe Bryant

3. Shaun White

4. Lionel Messi

5. Roger Federer

6. Cristiano Ronaldo

7. Michael Phelps

8. Usain Bolt

9. Rafael Nadal

10. Kevin Durant

11. Sydney Crosby

12. Roy Halladay

13. Lance Armstrong

14. Alexander Ovechkin

15. Josh Cribbs

So who are the other 21? I believe the 36 Superstars can change at any given moment. During the NCAA Basketball Tournament, one buzzer-beater makes a player a superstar, but a weekend later that player can fade right back into oblivion. Could it be that player started to believe he was one of the 36? Something that is just not allowed.

Here is the shortlist for some that may or may not be part of this special group... Wayne Rooney, Kaka, David Beckham (undeservedly) Dwayne Wade, Dwight Howard, Carmelo Anthony, Derrick Rose, Steve Nash, Albert Pujols, Stephen Strasburg (moves up as soon as he makes an MLB Start), Jason Heyward (already on his way to being 16), Ryan Braun, A-Rod, Mariano Rivera, Johan Santana, Peyton Manning, Andy Roddick, Venus and Serena Williams, Tiger Woods (clearly on the list until about 6 months ago), Phil Mickelson, Ryan Miller (if only because of his US Olympic performance) Candace Parker, The UConn Women's Basketball team, The Penn State Women's Volleyball team, Apollo Anton Ohno, a NASCAR guy, John Wall, Evan Turner, Brad Stevens (Yeah, coaches can be there).

But then again maybe this list is truly reserved for people like Former Central Washington first baseman Mallory Holtman, softball player carried around bases. For Rick and Dick Hoyt, who form Team Hoyt (must see video). For Maurice Cheeks helping a young girl sing the National Anthem. For Jason McElwain, the autistic high-school basketball player, or even for his coach Jim Johnson who gave him the chance to play.

The Lamed Vavniks are not necessarily the best. But they are those who come through for us in a time of need. Sports is about escape, when we are in need of healing.

So later this week when you are watching the NBA Playoffs, don't forget, the Lamed Vavniks emerge from their self-imposed concealment and, by the mystic powers, which they possess, they succeed in averting the threatened disasters of a people persecuted by the enemies that surround them... LeBron James anyone?

Your Starting QB #7 Ben Roethlisberger

The first three excuses I can think of from Browns fans on why not to bring in Roethlisberger are as follows.

1. He's a sworn enemy on and off the field.

2. He has off the field issues.

3. Because of 2, he is suspended for the first 6 games.

Guess What. I don't care. Before I even get started, let me dispell these excuses (because you know what they say about excuses).

1a. If 20 years ago Jon Elway said "I feel sorry for the Browns franchise, if it weren't for me they may have won a Super Bowl by now." Would you say "sorry we really like Brian Sipe?" If after the shot Jordan said "I got lucky on the shot, I have a better chance of becoming a superstar playing alongside Price and Daugherty than Pippen. I'm sure you'd say "no no please stay away, we like losing to you all the time. Imagine Roethlisberger being flipped with Phillip Rivers in 2004. We wouldn't even be making this excuse. The simple fact that he once wore Black and Yellow is not means for not having him on your team.

2. Roethlisberger's motorcycle accident in 2006 was not an off-field issue, people get in accidents. He got hit, albeit he should have had a helmet on, but he wasn't doing wheelies in a parking lot. Roethlisberger's off field issue have come since 2007. Mike Tomlin was hired to replace Bill Cowher in Pittsburgh in 2007. Maybe this is a coincidence, but I think not. Anyone who thinks Cowher and Tomlin run the same type of NFL Team doesn't know football. Different coaching styles, different demeanors. To me there is a reason Big Ben's issue off the field have been in the post-Cowher area. I'm not calling Tomlin soft, but personally I'd rather have Tomlin tell me off than Cowher. Mangini is a character guy, he may not be as mean as Cowher but he's more like Cowher than Tomlin. Not to mention Holmgren wouldn't allow it either.

3. The Browns are not going to contend this year. So does the fact that Roethlisberger will have to sit the first 6 games (maybe only 4 depending on how well he cooperates) really matter. Of course not.

Excuses dispelled, now onto the good stuff.

The draft is about getting better right? Bradford, Clausen, Tebow, LeFevour, Dan Whalen are not names of guys who have won Super Bowls, not names of guys who have gone to pro-bowls. Anytime you can get a proven NFL QB your team is going to get better. Look at Washington, look at Minnesota. 1st Round QBs make ridiculous amounts of money. Roethlisberger will make less money than Bradford, he will probably make less money than Clausen (if Clausen goes Top 10). His contract is actually attractive, despite the fact we just paid tons of money for Delhomme.

As I write, ESPN sources report that the Steelers would be willing to trade him for a Top 10 pick. Meanwhile the Pittsburgh Beat Writer is saying they aren't (of course he is, journalistic nightmare for him right now).

I do not want the Browns taking a QB in the draft, but if they trade for Roethlisberger they aren't really taking him in the draft. Say they flip the 7th pick and one of their 3rd for Roethlisberger and 18 (the Steelers first pick). Obviously Eric Berry is gone. But Earl Thomas and Taylor Mays are both likely still there. There is no guarantee that Berry would even be there at 7. Let's weigh this... Proven Top 10 NFL Starting QB and the second or third best free safety in the draft or the best safety in the draft. Hmm? A couple years ago Taylor Mays was being compared to Troy Polamalu he was a Top 10 pick before returning to school. Some draftniks are saying Thomas might be better than Berry. So if those three guys all end up having similar careers. How can you argue against getting a 28 year old 2x Super Bowl Winning Quarterback in his prime versus grabbing Tony Pike in the 3rd round?

You get Roethlisberger with a trade, Delhomme starts until he comes back. Then you have two NFL QBs in stead of two guys who might one day be NFL QBs.

Holmgren and Mangini can turn him around, he will come out of his suspension a better man, and with a renewed spirit. If you don't want him on your team because he played a couple hours East of here, you really don't want the Browns to get better.

Last time the Browns had a shot at Roethlisberger they took Kellen Winslow. Huge character guy in that pick right? In 2010 they have a chance to fix it. Do it!